Enjoying meaningful conversation with those we love and care about is one of the great pleasures of being human, and two great – and perfectly dove-tailing – articles giving ten top tips apiece have crossed my radar recently.
Continue reading “Top dos and don’ts of tender conversations”Category: Empathy
Loving someone can be, by its very nature, a vulnerable act; at any moment, the object of our affection can change their mind, reject us, disappoint or leave us.
For many of us, silence has become our way of knowing that something’s ended; from dating’s ever-present ghosting to the dearth of conversation between long-term partners.
The cruellest silence of all is the one that follows a beloved’s death. But what if you could still talk to them – and have them answer back?
Continue reading “Words to silence”If you’re a fan of a certain TV show, or have half an eye on social media, last Friday brought all of us a beautiful and poignant way of capturing loss: “What is grief, if not love, persevering?”
Continue reading “Love, persevering”As I’ve said before, given that ‘love’ is in the title of my website, I’m kinda contractually obliged to write about the subject when the month of February rolls around. And it’s one I’ve written about a lot.
But I confess that it’s been a subject that’s been playing on my mind recently. One I’ve actively wrestled with over the last month.
Continue reading “Love and hurt”I’ve been thinking about self-improvement lately, as I often meet folks who want to be a better person – either for themselves or so that their life might work a little better.
Continue reading “Stuck or broken?”One of my favourite quotes comes from the Zen Buddhist John Tarrant Roshi; “Attention is the most basic form of love. Through it to we blessed and are blessed.”
I’ve been thinking about attention over the last month – or more, how I planned to be really focused, to catch up on a ton of projects, and how all my plans went out of the window.
My mother was admitted to hospital out of the blue, so in many ways my attention has been scattered, lurching between concerns about the present and some pretty scary thinking about the future.
But in other ways, I’ve seen even more clearly how attention can be the most basic form of love. Continue reading “Attention is love”
Like everyone else, Covid 19’s interruption of life as normal has given me pause to stop and reflect. I’ve been thinking about what I value, the kind of life I want to live, and the kind of contribution I want to make to others.
And I’ve found a really interesting question to ask myself.
Continue reading “What problem are you really trying to solve?”
Here in the northern hemisphere it’s almost the summer solstice; the day of the year when the hours of daylight are longest, and the hours of darkness at their most brief.
And yet, world events make each passing day feel ever darker. Continue reading “How to provide hope”
This month, I’m going to share something very different.
One of the first pieces I ever had published was a poem, and yet I rarely read them – and the last one I wrote was five years ago. But a friend who lives overseas was struggling recently, and I wanted to keep in touch through loving voice messages.
I didn’t want to add to his mental load by chit-chatting about my day, though. So what could I say that would be short, helpful and meaningful? Continue reading “For a friend who is struggling”
So it’s been a week of love – a #LoveWeek, if you will. And I hate to be a Debbie Downer on the last day, but I need to acknowledge the elephant which may or not be residing in the room.
To wit: love isn’t for everyone.
Now don’t get me wrong, it clearly is. Come on. Love makes the world go round.
(OK, at the moment it’s money, which probably explains the shit creek we’re in.)
But when I say love isn’t for everyone, I mean: some of us have given up on love. We’ve lost hope. Continue reading “LoveWeek #5 – For those who’ve lost hope”
Let The Love In 